JBisms - edition 1

"This is much nastier than you would respect"
-referring to his destroyed cardboard fort

"How was it with Benaiah last night? Tell me all about it."
-referring to my time in the hospital giving birth.

Daddy on the phone: "Col ____ is going to eat me alive"
JB: "Mommy, let's pray that Daddy doesn't get eaten by his boss."

JB: "Daddy is strong. He's the only redneck at work."
-referring to "The World's Strongest Redneck" on Country Fried Home Videos

Discussing which book to read:
Mommy: "I changed my mind, let's read the blue book instead"
JB:" You're only allowed to have one mind Mommy!"

Gloria and JB playing with "pet" locust on the coffee table:
"Gloria, we don't know if she's a baby, or a mommy, or a daddy, or a Christian!"